dun tok

i dunnoe wadd has gone into mie
everithin was rong wif mie.
i was rong to b here
in the 1st place aniwae.

b4 i start off wif myy crapps
if euu aint prepared to
read todae`s entrie.
juz dun.
i dun wan ppl accusin mie
tokin abt stuffs when i dun even
noe the situation.
i wud like to make tis
clear to ppl out there again.
tt tis ish myy blogg
n it ish where i xpress
how i feel towards certain stuff.
if euu cant accept n r unsatisfied
wif wadd tis blogg contains.
pls dun dragg urself n continue readin
click tt cross up there instead.
n leave. thnk euu. ((:


i cudnt face euu.
n im sure the rez includin euu
werent gonna tolerate
if i started flarrin up n all tt sort.
im makin ur lives difficult
i apologised.juz dun bother abt mie.
from the start euu shudnt.
it shortens ur life spend on earth.
aniwae euu`ve gt plenty
of other problems euu gt
to help discussed n yadayada.
i dun wanna b the xtra pain in ur ass.
btw im unreasonable.stubborn
has an edginess attitude.
yeah n practicallaye everithin
bad chracter a person can encompass.

i din wan some1 to lie to mie.
okaye i heard ronglaye
bt din euu saed euu were LEAVIN?!
let mie defined the word leavin :
partin ; goodbye
maebe i interpreted ronglaye.
bt tt`s the idea euu gaf us
i tot euu were gonna head hme
euu even to0k ur bagg along wif euu
where else cud euu b headin bt hme
; i tot...
so thn we pei jam to go visit euu.
there i see some1 sittin there
nt intendin to go hme.
instead tokin wif euu.
how do euu xpect mie to accept
the fact tt euu saed euu were leavin.
where were euu leavin?!
if euu were leavin
yy does ur presence befalls
in front of myy veri own eyes?!
if euu wanna leave us n go tok to him
issit so freakin hard to juz
mouth those words to us?!
yy in the world wud euu wanna
hide it from us?!
nt like euu r doin anithin illegal
dun we share the same bro?!
he isnt all 4 urself.waddeva.
im kickin up a bigg fuss abt tis
entire thin.i juz dun see the point
euu r goin nowhere by hidin the truth
from us yea...hais waddeva lars.

euu euu euu euu.
i dunnoe.i reallaye dunnoe.
i dunnoe wadd to sae abt euu.
i gt nth to xplain 4 anithin.

i reallaye dun wan to b how it was laz time
there was a period of time.
i juz felt fuckin ostracized
by myy own clique.
n so i was closer wif
myy fellow dance mates
thn euu all r nt happaye?!
wadd do euu wan?!
euu dun make mie feel like i wasnt
part of euu guys yet when im wif others
its myy fault again?!
tt i onlaye stiick wif them.
wadd ish all tis.
let mie tell euu
examples of contradictions ;
-euu tell ur fwen to tryy to open up,
dun hide ur own feelins.
yet when they tried to,
euu sae they r givin attitude.
when will euu all eva
b satisfied 4 hu the person ish.
another thin...
-euu saed euu`ll b there when ur fwen
ish sadd n all tt.
n when tt person reallaye becomes
upset ova some particular stuff.
euu accused them n sae they attitude
anihow throw temper.
n euu cant b bothered abt them.
euu dun allow their unhappiness to
ruiiin ur happaye jolly dae.
all r juz pathetic words ; meaninless.
words - actions = NOTHIN
juz words n no actions ish nth.
how do euu now xpect ur fwens
to open up to euu when euu r juz
neva contented wif waddeva actions
they do.when will euu eva
accept ur fwen 4 hu she/he ish?!
contradictoraye yeah.
dun accused ppl of their faults,
when euu,urself ish unable to overcome them.
wadd ish all this?!tell mie.
incapable of listin thins huh?!
ferrget it.

im nt bein hypocritical[stan`s recent post]
i so do nt wan ppl`s greatez sympathy
n all tt mushy squishy squashy words
of all types. yea yea...
i noe ppl unintentionallaye contridicts
well ppl make mistakes ehs?!



i juz expected wadd i wanted.
yet it alwaes turn out the unexpected.


pls dun come sae sorraye to mie
euu did nth rong to make mie
earn tt sorraye.
pls...


i seriouslaye dun wanna b tt
lonelaye weiirdo
i hate the silence.the whole world
was against mie.
i dun wanna suffer tt again.
i alwaes do n sae the rong thins
at the rong time.
everithin went rong for mie.
i dunnoe.i sound like some pathetic loner.
hu onlaye has her fwens to rely on.
like some bedridden freak.
hu depends on everi other ppl bt myyself.

i dun wanna suffer depression
like tt gurl in the sundae`s newpaper.
n thn commit suicide.
i cant bare to hurt myyself.
i gt no courage to do tt.
let mie juz die mysteriouslaye.
pls attempt to kill mie.
i dun wanna live a horrible life.
i`d rather die ((:
thn i wud b in heaven wif myy LORD.
im happaye.

will the violins be playing? 19:26 ;